If you want me to.

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Ollie is very polite. He has lovely manners ,which is of course a good thing. But recently he has taken to answering with “If you would like me to ” “I will if you want me to”

I’m not sure why. Perhaps its because he’s just eager to please ,perhaps its easier than having to choose things for himself ,I don’t know.

But it troubles me a little because I want ,need Ollie know that he’s allowed to choose. He’s allowed to say no.

Obviously not in all cases ,but when I ask if he would like a drink I don’t want him to reply with “I’ll have one if you want me to ”

When I ask if him to come over and give me a hug I don’t want him to say “I will if you want”

I could go on and on but I’m sure you have got my drift.

I want him to know that for example that if he doesn’t want to give me a hug he can day no ,it’s his choice.

And that he is allowed to say ”No I don’t want to do that “

I want him to know that he doesn’t always have to please people. I don’t want him to be vulnerable because he likes to do what others ask of him.

He doesn’t really get it at the moment. though. So every conversation goes like this :

“Do you want to …..”

“I will if you want me to”

“Do YOU want to?”

“If you want me to”

“But do YOU want to”

“If you want me to”

repeat to infinity .
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