A beautiful tragedy

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Insomnia has me again.
As I snuggled down with Ollie
Tonight I could feel
Sleep taking over ,
I put my book down
Ready , ready for sleep to wrap me up
And replenish my tired soul

But the time ticked by
It never stops does it
Ticking away
Sleep had lost the fight
With insomnia
I’ve resigned myself to it
Tonight my tired soul will have no rest

But there is something beautiful
Imagine with me – if you will
A quiet house
Earlier filled with children
Making too much noise
The dog barking
Too much.
The cat meaowing
It’s beautiful.
When insomnia has crept in
And taken over your night
It’s beautiful.
Stop stressing ,
stop watching the clock
Waiting for sleep
And listen

Listen
I can hear ollie (9) snoring in my ear , I hear him sucking his thumb and I see him fiddling with blanky in his restless sleep.
Right now he’s not tic’ing or autistic
He’s asleep
Innocent natural. He’s just Ollie.
His sleep noises soothe my soul.
I hear maxi the dog and Zoë (12) snoring too.
That’s 3 snorers out of sync
Yet somehow just right.
There will be sleep talking too.
From Ollie and Zoë
If I go down a flight of stairs I hear 14 and 15 year olds snoring
Innocent natural
We argued today
But they are insanely peacefully wonderful
Now asleep
hearing their sleeping sounds
Fills my bruised tired heart
With love.

Everyone is home.
Everyone is noisy but if you
Just listen to the sounds at night
You hear contentment , safeness ,
Your hear love , in Their
Restful sleep you hear love

Insomnia is a tragedy
it robs me of replenishing sleep
My soul aches for sleep

But it allows me Time
Where I feel
I’m the only person awake
Where the world is quiet
Where I hear the beautiful
Sounds of my children sleeping.
I can feel alone but not lonely ,
I hear the house resting.

It is a beautiful tragedy.

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