at our primary school we have something called place to be. It’s a counselling type thing for kids , they talk while they play. There is also a parent counsellor , O goes to the place to be for an hour once a week. .
The school have been suggesting for a while that I used the service. And then an appointment was made for me for this morning.
Well , I was not happy at all .
I felt like the school were pushing me to do this as a way of highlighting what a terrible job I’m doing and how O is probably finding school tough because he has a terrible mother.
Absolving themselves of any blame for this situation.
The general view on twitter last night was that I should go anyway because I might end up getting something out of it.
I wasn’t convinced.
I decided I was going to go , just to make my point about how much I really didn’t want to be there.
I was wrong.
The lady is lovely.
She had obviously done her homework , she knew a lot about my family.
Almost straight off she told me that she could see by the way that I was sitting , fiddling, breathing that I’m obviously full of stress and anxiety.
And that if I would let her she would work with me to deal with this.
We talked about how I have a lot of anger and frustration towards the school and the system. Which is making my anxiety worse which is probably causing all the recent flares I’ve suffered with my health.
She wants to teach me how to breath , how to relax .
She wants me to talk to her , to offload , to vent , to let her support me.
We talked a lot about O.
She has a great understanding of autism.
She agreed that things have been done all wrong so far.
We talked about the irony of the schools new sign which features a child in a wheel chair. Obviously giving the Message that they are an inclusive school.
When O is being actively excluded
We talked about how the staff should know more about autism.
She’s going to ask the place to be manager to arrange a way that she can speak to the staff about autism.
We talked a lot.
About a lot of things
It was easy
It felt good.
It felt like help.
Like a small weight was lifting.
I’m going back